First of all, dont miss your morning quiet time with God for strength.  Play worship music in your home.  Have a talk with your son, nicely and with a smile tell him how much you love him and tell him what you DO LOVE about him.  Then tell him you dont like whats going on here so, you will no longer argue with him.  Arguing is NOT ALLOWED in the house.  He is not allowed to Challenge you or talk back to you or complain.  He has no say so on any of your commands or rules or decisions.  YOU are the son and i am the MOM.  He does what you say and thats all. Begin to take things away from him when he doesnt obey or get up in the morning or whatever.  No, second chances!  If he doesnt do his school work take the remote to the tv.  Now he has to get up and down to change channels.  If he begins to argue or complain take the tv, if he continues, you continue to take things.  Take him to church, he has no choice he must go. Make him read his bible.  FORCE HIM, it is the WORD of GOD that he needs to feed on.  If he refuses to eat food wouldnt you resort to forcing him????  Your child needs God.  Its that simple make some new ground rules, make some changes and stick to them.  BUt in everything in your voice and tone, it must be with love, gentleness and kindness.  Never YELL, or nag.  Just make your no mean no and your yes mean yes.  Remember WHAT YOU PERMIT to go on in your household YOU PROMOTE. About your husband, he may be depressed because of the financial situation.  Begin to encourage him, be his cheerleader!  Tell him he can do it.  Tell him, he tried his best and now G od will do the rest, pray with him and for him.. Mom, right now, you need to clean up and make things happen.  God will strengthen you.  PRay, praise and laugh and show love to your son and husband.  They need you right now.  You can do this girl!