Noel, I am praying for you and your wife. It is a hard time for you. I am sorry about facing the hearing. I don't know much about the legal part except several people (men) who have gone through divorce recently has spent to much money on divorce. One person said he lost about 150K.  I am thinking about not even showing up for mine if my wife and I are agreeing on the financial and parenting plan. A colleague I worked with said his wife didn't show up because the divorce was uncontested.

I understand your pain. The last two weeks my sadness has been intense. The other night I felt like just giving up but I know that is the stage of depression I am in and it will get better as I trust God. It does seem like prayers go unheard. I am studying Larry Crabb's book "Shattered Dreams" and it talks about how it seems God is so silent in our turmoil. He says God wants to awaken us to a higher desire of truly knowing Him by dying to our so called lesser dreams. It does seem like I want relief from the pain more than God sometimes, I admit and hopefully underneath it all, I will come to the place of only wanting God because all else has been stripped away in my life. I feel for you and I pray you dental work will go smoothly.

I along with you struggle to find the answers to your questions. I may thing I know one day when I am close fellowship and had a victory and another day feel like where is God. I do feel so along sometimes and at other times close to God. But the aloneness seem to be magnified. I can see how many will go to fill their lives with things like women, projects, work etc... to avoid the pain we feel. And what about the other side of the coin when we focus too much on the pain. It is a hard battle. I know in my mind that God has a greater blessing, to know Him is a deep way but my heart struggles to move about 12 inches up to what my mind believes. Last night my wife talked about how she went out with her friends, mainly to meet this woman her guy pal is dating. She said that the gal was not good for her friend. This guy pal told my wife that she is a lot like her and that she would like him. I told my wife maybe her guy pal likes her and she just ignored my statement. This is the guy that spends lots of time with my son and wife. She says she has not interest in him. Probably true, but the sadness in me intensifies when I hear stuff like this. So I know I feel like this because I am going through depression and I have dealt with the bargaining and anger for most of it, I hope. I will pray for Brandon. I feel for him with the 3 yr. old like my son.  God bless Noel

Hi TexHill,

It's good to hear from you again, but I'm so sorry it's under such tough circumstances. I could hear the pain in your post, and am hoping that you're doing ok today. If you've got a couple of good friends you can trust, let them help you through this. Healing from divorce can be a hard journey but I'll be praying that God would carry you through. I understand the feeling of "where is God in all of this?" and also the feeling of just losing faith. When I'm in times like that, I just rely on the fact that even when I feel like I can't hang on to God or my faith, that He's still holding on to me. And having come out the other side of some rough times in my life, I can see that it's really true. Please consider giving our counselors a call when you need to just talk to someone, to get some encouragement. You can also call us if you just want someone to pray with you...our number is 800/A-FAMILY (800-232-6459). I also found a lot of help in these devotionals: Hope for a Hopeless Day: Encouragement and Inspiration When You Need It Most and Streams in the Desert. DivorceCare groups might also help...in spite of how it might feel, you are not alone!

Please keep us posted, TexHill. We care about you and will definitely be praying.

Sunny    

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