Hi Jenison,

I have 3 boys who are older now...I have been in your shoes.....first and formost, you must listen to your child. We have been in public & private schools over the years. (we move a lot)  If your child is expressing these emotions towards the teacher, there is a good chance something has happened.  It could be as simple as she corrected him in class and it embarrassed  him. Or, she could be what I call a "closet teacher".

A closet teacher is one who on the front is very caring, loving and in our case was a Christian teacher. She put on a good front for the parents, but once the door closed she was not friendly with the children.

I would sit your son down and have him explain to you "how she is mean" or "how she yelled"  and "what did she yell about"..... the biggest mistake you can make is being afraid to "rock the boat" with your son's teacher. Once you have the information you need from him, schedule a meeting with this teacher and have another person there, a principal, a friend, just someone who can calm things down if needed.

Remember to start the meeting off with a postive..."Little Johnny loves school and he was excited about starting the new year with his friends" then gently lead into your concerns...."we are a concerned because Johnny has not wanted to come to school, have you seen anything going on that would lead him to be so unhappy" if you this doesn't answer the why, you gently tell her that your son has persieved "your tone as "yelling" is there something going on in the class that would cause you to raise your voice?"

It is very important for you to address these issues from the start.  In my experience of being a mom for almost 17 years now, most teachers once directly told or asked about their relationship with your son will make things better.  We have, however, experienced teachers who are just plain mean and really should retire, in which case you should request your child be moved to another room. Believe me, if you talk to her about it, you will know in your heart whether or not she is sincere.

Teachers have big jobs and if it is the start of school, chances are, she is trying to set some ground rules and it scared him.  There are always children in a class who 'need more attention' and sometimes, firm redirection or rules can scare another child into thinking the teacher is mean.

I don't think you should remove him from the school he has been in for years unless you have solid proof there is real danger to your child's emotional or physical well being. And, because it is a private school remember.....you are paying them to work for you....so as a customer, you deserve satification. (as does your child)

Remember too, that your coming off of summer, home is much more fun with Mommy and not a care in the world.  Try not to coddle him to much with his fears, reassure him the teacher is there to teach him and protect him.

You ARE the only ADVOCATE for your child, if there is a problem, you need to make it a point to be involved and in the school as often as possible... I hope something I have written will be of  help.....good luck!