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So you sinned this week against someone? I'm not surprised. Sinning is what sinners like you and like me do. Instead of being surprised by our sin, or the sins of others, we should learn how to deal with it rightly.

 

C.J. Mahaney, best known for his passionate awe of the cross of Christ, wrote about wrong ways to deal with your sin, and right ways. Wrong ways include using the word "if" (e.g., "I'm sorry if you were offended"), providing lengthy explanations of why you sinned, requesting understanding for your sin, being indignant about being caught, and so on.

 

Here's how he describes a right way to confess sin:

 

A confession that is sincere and pleasing to God will be specific and brief. I have learned to be suspicious of my confession if it's general and lengthy. A sincere confession of sin should be specific ("I was arrogant and angry when I made that statement; will you please forgive me for sinning against you in this way?") and brief (this shouldn't take long). When I find myself adding an explanation to my confession, I'm not asking forgiveness but instead appealing for understanding....

 

Genuine conviction of sin is evidenced by a sincere, specific, and brief confession of sin, without any reference to circumstances or the participation of anyone else. When I sin, I am responsible for my sin, and the cause of my sin is always within my heart and never lies outside my heart.

 

The thing is, such honest and vulnerable and responsible confession of sin is actually liberating, because there is One who is able to thoroughly forgive sin -- any sin. Because of the death of the only righteous Man ever to have existed, sin may be completely forgiven. And C.J. recognizes the hopefulness of this situation:

 

I want my confession to express genuine sorrow and gratefulness to God for the mercy I experience because of the substitutionary sacrifice of his Son for my sins on the cross.... I hope my confession of sin is the sincere and specific confession of one genuinely convicted of his sin, sorrowful about his sin, and amazed at the grace of God provided for the forgiveness of sin.

 

I'm freshly convicted of how I deal with my own sin. I'm looking forward to being specific and sincere as I confess my sin to my wife, and to others whom I sin against. And I'm looking forward to enjoying the benefits of being a child of the God Who Forgives, whose mercies are new every morning every moment.

 

HT: Peacemaker Ministries's blog, Route 5:9

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Oct 21, 2009 12:09 PM Guest Em  says:

Great post!

I think it's also worth mentioning the reaction of the person who was wronged (ie: spouse, etc).  I think it's important for the that person to specifically (and briefly!) state "I forgive you".  All too often apologies are brushed off with an awkward "don't worry about it", or "no problem".  While this person is probably being genuine, it doesn't acknowledge the sincerity and effort that they are putting into their apology.  My husband and I discussed this in our premarital counseling, and it has helped us in our marriage today.  It keeps us on the same page .

Just a thought!